Hello there! Good news from my family to yours.
A new addition to the EggBert family is arriving in Sunny SD very, very soon. My Aunt Bertha is returning from Alaska (via canoe) where she used her irresistable charm and rape-drug one passionate night a few months ago to manhandle and have her way with GOP V.P. candidate’s hubby Hotty Toddy.  She retreated from oil-bellied Alaska as soon as Toddy advised Bertha to abort the love-child, but utilizing her strong right-winged arm of morals she fled out the back door of the Wasilla Moose & Drool Pub, stole Hotty Toddy Paladin’s award-winning snow-machine, barely escaped the clutches of pissed-off members of the Wasilla Wheelin’ Women’s Associated Pro-Abortion Medical Opt Out Safety Elite (WWWAP-A MOOSE – see photo below),
and is now paddling her bundle of Pro-Life, bastardly joy down the Bering Strait to stateside with her new lover and canoe-mate, Eddie Eskimo.
Though my family looks forward to helping raise Aunt Bertha’s bastardly Alaskan baby, we urge you to Vote Yes For Life on South Dakota Measure 11 on November 4th. The close-knit EggBert family (except Uncle Rusty and Grumps Gramps who ignorantly do NOT want our beloved Gov. Mike Roundless’s-led SD government dictating what should happen to the baby-making parts or portions of baby-bloodthirsty, irresponsibly impregnated SD women) does not believe people should have sexual touching issues IF they want the unborn baby killed by greedy, crime-commiting doctors. Although an abortion can still be applied IF there is health-related endangerment to the mother and if there are cases of rape and/or incest, the birth of my fragile and sissy sister-nephew Nathan Jane WASN’T and NEVER will be celebrated in the EggBert family because she/he WAS and still IS an evil abortion attempt.  Icky!Â
Oh well, at least the isolated freak isn’t a blob of dead tissue goo.Â
Sincerely,
EggBert Tiber. Frank. Ichab. Goofen.
P.S. VOTE YES FOR LIFE (except in cases like Nathan Jane and Democrat zombies)
Boy – Not sure if that was a ringing endorsement or not? I think I will have to sleep on it.