2008

Urgent Action Needed! Please Help Out!

As you may already know, several large investment banks have recently gone tits up. Thousands of investment bankers will soon be in line for a table at Applebee’s, forgoing their usual reservation at Spago. An estimated 100,000* executives from the nation’s largest companies may soon be jumping from a window near you!

Do your part!

Please make donations to the Lehman Bros. charity fund, a non-profit group dedicated to assisting suicidal and soon-to-be-broke mid-level executives. Your donation will help to prop up the threatened lifestyles of investment bankers across the NYC tri-state area.

Please hurry!

Many executives have already had to sell their properties in the Hamptons, and many more are thinking about selling their yaghts. If this crisis lasts as long as expected, many investment bankers will be forced to summer and winter in the same home!

Please make your donation via Paypal today!**

*All figures derived ex rectum 
**Please send payments to Ghost of Dude at his e-mail address, ghostofdude@yourmom.com

 

 

Dykstra’s new TV ad

A very strange ad.

I saw this last night on TV and was confused by the AD. All it does is attack Johnson for not debating him, but doesn’t talk about what issues Dykstra stands for. I would think someone with limited funds would take every opportunity to tell South Dakotans what he stands for. Joel, you really need to get over this debate thing, the Scott Tissue company is having a hard time keeping up with production.