South DaCola

Editorial Cartoonist from South Dakota

2008

Uncategorized

VOTE YES for Initiating a Government-Enforced Women’s Health-Mandate for Creating LIFE (since they need government help because they can’t make the right healthy choices most of the time)

EggBert 0Comments

Hey there:

I just HAVE to catch you up on what’s all happening with the EggBert family. Things have changed quickly around the household. It has been discovered via in-depth investigations by the Sioux Falls super sleuth reporting teams from the Argyle Leader newspaper, KELO-world TV, CMN’s Just the Facts of Life , KBLT, and OKSFY that my Aunt Bertha actually was NOT impregnated by the GOP V.P. Candidate’s Hotty hubby Toddy on her recent trip to stalk him up in Alaska. Doggone it all if she didn’t fake the whole thing.

Note: Below is an exclusive post-investigation photo of OKSFY’s Nancy Naive demonstrating a true-blue abstinence-only procedure.

Woman Gymnast

It seems that Aunt Bertha’s motive in telling this little white lie of impregnation was clearly innocent and justified as she just only wanted to make my Uncle Rusty green-eyed with envy. Well, it didn’t work because steely-eyed and staunchly radical Uncle Rusty just continued drinking beer and watching his favorite left-winging, leftist, liberal TV networks (like PBS, CNN, MSNBC, and Animal Planet) throughout the entire ordeal. Aunt Bertha’s brilliant performance failed as Rusty ignored her futile attempts at convincing him to “keep the baby” by refusing to seek her BigOBGYN’s advice while planning instead to just dive into direct sexual-crisis issue counseling sessions with Pastor Steve of Church of the Late Gate. 

A family statement released to the media by my unmarried, prego-neice Nellie’s boyfriend, Petey Schwetty, pretty much sums up this exciting happy-ending story: “It’s a good thing my chick and I listened to Pastor Steve’s sexual-crisis issue counseling instead of Nellie’s ignorant woman-doctor, because after Nov. 4th, chicks I get laid will not only have Pastor Steve’s blessing, but they will have the protection of Governor Rounds and his government.  May the doctor’s decision-making powers of persuasion of this nation be cast away and damned, and may nitwits like my prego girlfriend, Nellie, remain where they ought to be – making babies, NOT making baby-making decisions. Plus, we need something else in the house to kick around since our mutt-of-a-dog , Ass-Wipe, got horny and recently ran off with some bitch…” 

So, alas, my Aunt Bertha is not really oven-bunned, not just yet, anyway – but WHEN Initiative 11 passes on Tuesday (and it surely will, because the majority of South Dakotans BELIEVE in Republican Party values i.e. freedom of choice like not restricting and regulating gun usage, less bureaucratic intrusion on health issues like not banning smoking in restaurants, smaller government like not having extra employees monitoring and mandating stuff on us, and eliminating wasteful spending on things like frivoulous lawsuits for unconstitional laws, etc.), then she will head to Alaska once again to make all attempts to seal the Hotty Toddy deal. And the government, with great care and efficiency, will be there to decide the fate of women and men who want to engage their baby-making processes. 

(See photo below of Governor Rounds and his Makin’ Whoopie Militia rehearse the newly-passed Initiative 11 law drill at the Unversity of SD after “Dick and Jane” get caught trying to “get it on” WITHOUT baby-making/delivering/raising/or giving up for adoption regardless of situation INTENT…)

Oh, by the way, it was also recently discovered and uncovered by OKSFY’s weatherman/reporter/singer and all-around hunk, Shaun CableTV, that my sister-nephew, Nathan Jane, was not actually conceived of incestual EggBert famiily pants or genes, but is instead found out to be a homotrisexual “it” with 3 separate reproductive genitalia parts: that of a man, woman, and “ALPHA” creature. An “Alpha” (commonly known as “Alphelpha”) is embryonically and cryogenically created by the wonderful folks at the Unrrruuughh’s Alphabetized Center.  This “Phelpha” (as it is also often called) was recently adopted out to a compatible and intelligent family-like group of people (due to confidentiality the names of the parents cannot be released) and its new name was legally changed from Nathan Jane to Leslie Steve Allen Brandi Geibink-Cable.

Sincerely,

EggBert qwertyuiopasdfghjklzxcvbnm

Measure 10 Measure 11

Debates on Measure 10 & 11

l3wis 2Comments

Will be re-broadcast on SD Public TV tommorrow (Sunday) at 1 PM.

Highlights from the debates are when Dr.(?) Backcracker Allen Unruh puts on his best Bill O’ Reilly of Abortion impression and Dena from Yes on 10 winks at us, and her opponent, ironically has to admit he is a paid lobbyist. (Surprised he isn’t working for the McLame campaign.)

Citizens for Reponsible Sales Tax SF City Council Sioux Falls Taxes

A Sales Tax DECREASE will actually help local growth

l3wis 0Comments

Do you think city hall knows how to spend your hard earned money better then you? When the mayor and half of the council raised your sales tax, that’s exactly what they told you. They believe in the ‘trickle down economics’ model of taxation; increase taxes and give that additional revenue to special interests such as developers and contractors in hopes that money will ‘trickle back’ down to those original taxpayers in the form of jobs and growth.

It’s a backwards way of spending YOUR money to improve this community. There is a better way to move us forward; let taxpayers spend that money individually instead of handing it over to city bureaucrats and special interests.

They disguised this regressive tax increase as being progressive because they claim it will help our city grow. Hogwash.

 I’m all for new and maintained roads – I’m just against how they want to pay for them. New roads can be paid for through developer fees, which I fully support and roads can be maintained through the sales tax we already pay. Councilor Costello put it best in an Argus Leader article “It’s a shell game.” There is nothing stopping our mayor and the city council from spending those increased taxes on anything they want to. They sold it to us by saying we needed the new roads yet the CIP budget (which is also funded with sales tax) is packed full of unneeded projects that only benefit a few in our community not the greater good. We can cut the CIP easily and make up for this sales tax decrease. It will mandate the mayor and city council to spend within their means for at least one year (2010) and you also have to remember we may have up to four new councilors and a new mayor in 2010, lets break them in right by showing them they need to have some fiscal restraint.

Want REAL growth in our community? Stop overtaxing our citizens on necessities like food and utilities and let them spend that money on goods and services that helps ALL local businesses grow not just a select few lucky enough to get a handout from the city.

Local business drives our economy in the form of good jobs which promotes growth. Would Sioux Falls grow stronger if ALL local business were getting a piece of the pie and not just the special interests?

Scott L. Ehrisman

Co-Chair, Citizens for a Responsible Sales Tax

Theresa Stehly and I will be on the local radio talk show hosted by Jon Micheals, FORUM on all the Backyard Broadcasting stations Sunday Morning talking about the petition drive for the initiative to reduce sales taxes.

KELO AM and FM at 7 AM and all the other stations at 8 AM. I believe the interview lasted about 40 minutes.

abortion Measure 11

Impatient Anti-choicer wants to be heard

l3wis 8Comments

I moderate my comments on here and on KELO, so they go to my email first before I release them, but apparently that wasn’t fast enough for this guy, so he emailed to me.

Care to post the comment I submitted earlier today in rebuttal to your im11 cartoon or will that throw your left-wing agenda too far off course?

Another same old, same old argument from the anti-choice side:

The only thing wrong with Initiated Measure 11 is that is devalues the life of a child conceived of rape or incest.  By including exceptions in the initiated measure for rape and incest, it conveys the idea that a child has to be born of perfect health and perfect circumstance to be deemed worthy of life.

What most pro-choice supporters still don’t understand about most pro-life supporters is that we are not trying to make life difficult for the mother by denying her easy and open access to an abortion; rather, we are trying to preserve the right of the unborn child to have life.

If a mother does not want to keep a child born of rape or incest, there are plenty of organizations willing to help her (both financially and emotionally) to bring the child to full term and delivery so that the child can be adopted by someone who will appreciate the child regardless of the way in which it was conceived.

Rape and incest are horrible acts inflicted upon a mother.  The offenders, if identified, should be the locked up for life and made to pay for their offense.  The innocent unborn child however, should not be recipient of the punishment.  The child is innocent of the crime.

The mother is innocent of the crime as well.  She didn’t ask to be raped or victimized.  However, when she chooses to have an abortion rather than to carry her child to a full-term delivery, she falls into the cycle of abuse.  There is no healing from abuse.

If you look at a 2-year-old on the street, could you readily identify that child as being born of rape or incest if that was the case?  Would the child have a scarlet ‘R’ or ‘I’ emblazened on his or her forehead?  Of course not.  The child, in a nurturing environment, would be like any other 2-year-old.  Would anyone warrant the killing of that child once he or she was identified as a rape or incest kid?  Of course not.  Because, at 2-years-old, we can see that the child is a living breathing child with potential.  Back up two years to the birth of the same child.  He or she is lying in mom’s arms just after coming into the ‘outside’ world for the first time.  Eyes are open, purple skin is taking on color, there might even be a smile looking back at the strange yet familiar lady holding him or her.  Does that child have a scarlet ‘R’ or ‘I’ emblazened on his or her forehead?  Would anyone warrant the killing of that newborn child once he or she was identified as a rape or incest kid?  Of course not.

Back up four months previous to the birth of the same child.  He or she is lying in mom’s womb just waiting to arrive into this world.  He or she has no knowledge of having been conceived or rape or incest.  He or she has a beating heart just like a child conceived by a ‘normal’ married couple.  He or she has a brain just like that of a child conceived by ‘normal’ means.  The child is a whole living being complete with arms, legs, toes and fingers.  The child can distinguish mom’s voice from another and is near or at the point of viability if it were to arrive into the world a bit earlier than planned.

What’s the main difference between the child at 5 months old on the inside of mom’s womb vs the child just born into the world and lying in mom’s arms or in the arms of a loving adoptive parent…?

…one is going to have a chance at life while the other is about to have his or her body parts pulled out one by one by an abortion doctor who’s going to be $700 richer in about 15 minutes…

Scott M.

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