2009
I have the best dreams!
I can’t remember there being a point to any of it, but I thought it might be fun to run through the highlights.
For some reason I was at work on a Sunday and couldn’t check my voicemail. GoD stops by to use the shitter, and brought a ‘Post-Feminism-Lesbian-MAXIM-Assault-Weapon-Weekly’ magazine with him to read, but ends up leaving it on my desk. Inside the mag, instead of samples of perfume, there is a single prosthetic labia attached to an advertisement for vaginal reconstruction. For some reason I tear it out and start pretending it is a fake moustache, walking around and putting it up to peoples faces to see what they look like with ‘labia-lip’. One of these people is my mom, who starts to freak out about the idea of fake mommy parts touching her face, when I reassure her that in reality I am holding a 4 foot long plastic iguana, and the very end of the tail was what I was pretending was the moustache. That is about the time that I notice that my voicemail light isn’t on anymore, and I start feeling like I’m choking and can’t breath. So I rush off to the bathroom, which is hard to find because for some reason I work in a giant building that is a cross between the YMCA, John Morrell, and the Old Courthouse. When I look in the mirror, there is a hair sticking out of my mouth. For the remainder of my dream, I am pulling huge hairballs out of my throat, stomach, sinuses and inner ear. Great big gobs of bathroom sink and tub drain type hairballs. They look like they’ve been steeped in soap scum and mold and they smell and taste about the same.
Someone walks in the bathroom and reminds me that it’s time to go bowling. It is at THAT POINT that I realize I’m dreaming… I don’t ever go bowling.. and that is what’s weird enough to wake me up.
Term Limits and Taxes
The Argus Leader had a pair of great letters to the editor today.
The first one was slamming a regular neo-con who spews about the benefits of taxcuts;
I grew up in a South Dakota community that had WPA or PWA stamped on everything from schools to sidewalks. My quality of life to this day (62 years) has been impacted more by the New Deal and the Great Society than all other presidents and eras combined.
Couldn’t agree more. Things were built better back then to.
South Dakota state legislators simply don’t understand. Last year they placed a constitutional amendment on the ballot to repeal term limits. The measure fell flat with more than 76 percent of voters casting their votes against the effort to repeal the state’s current term limits law.
I think all legislators need to take an IQ test in South Dakota before they are allowed to run for office. I think it would eliminate the Gordon Howie’s of the legislature.
Republicanistical Party
Love him or hate him, Barney Frank is a funny one. He slams a Republican who is trying to be clever;
Chris Matthews takes Darrell Issa to task on Hardball for using the term “Democrat Party”.
Matthews: Well, I think the Democratic Party calls itself the Democratic Party, not the Democrat Party. Do we have to do this every night? Why do people talk like this? Is this just fighting words to get the name wrong?
Issa: This isn’t intended to be fighting words.
Matthews: They call themselves the Democratic Party. Let’s just call people what they call themselves and stop the uh, the Mickey Mouse here. Save that for the stump-seriously.
Issa: Chris, Chris.
Matthews: Now let’s get to the issue here, seriously we’ve got a fiscal challenge. I want to go back to Congressman Frank and to some English here. Congressman Frank are you worried about the size of these WWII numbers here? Again, 1.75 trillion deficit this year. A spending level of almost 4 trillion. We’re almost running deficits as big as the revenue number we’re bringing in.
Frank: Well Chris let me first of all come to the defense of my colleague Mr. Issa and the Republicanistical Party that he represents, um and say that ah…
Issa: Thanks Barney.
Frank: You’re welcome there Darrell. The point is this. For him to say oh these are the Democrat’s deficits. I have never seen people disavow their own handiwork so quickly. And I knew that born again was an important strain, in in our society but born again deficit haters, it’s a new version.
The Prohibition of Mary Jane may end
Another positive outcome of the recession? Maybe.
Of course Glenn “Fuck up a wet dream” Beck acts like a junior high kid talking about vaginas in the back of the classroom;
Glenn Beck had on Rob Kampia of the Marijuana Policy Project to discuss the proposal to decriminalize pot possession in California and to use the revenues to pay down the state’s budget deficit.
Now, Beck has already wished aloud that we could kick California out of the Union, so no doubt this just adds to his angst.
But if you’ll notice: One person in this conversation was calm, reasonable, had an abundance of facts at hand, and actually made pretty good sense. The other person was incoherent, meandering, silly, made a lot of irrelevant observations from outer space, and relied on dumb stereotypes and non-facts.
And Glenn Beck was not the former. On top of that, his nonstop sneering at Kampia made him look like a real sphincter.
In fact, this entire clip generally makes a convincing argument in favor of the marijuana advocates. If the best the opposition can come up with is this kind of gaping stupidity …