CARROTS

I OFTEN WONDER IF CARROTS WOULD BE MORE POPULAR IF THEY WERE NAMED ORANGES? THEY ARE MORE OBVIOUSLY ORANGE THEN ORANGES.

PROBABLY NOT. AND YOU WANNA KNOW WHY? BECUZ CARROTS SUCK.

IT’S NOT LIKE THEY TASTE AS BAD AS LIVER OR ZUCCHINNI? THEY HAVE NO TASTE. COOKED OR RAW.

AND TRUST ME, I TRIED TO BECOME A FAN. I’VE SOAKED THEM IN RANCH DRESSING, COOKED THEM AND MIXED THEM WITH BUTTER AND BROWN SUGAR. STILL SHIT.

CARROTS BELONG TO THE COCONUT, RAISIN, BANANA FOOD GROUP IN MY BOOK (OTHER FOODS I HATE.)

S. L. Ehrisman (c) 12/12/10

By l3wis

10 thoughts on “The Ugly Table (#14)”
  1. Skin them and keep cold in water in the refigerator. They’re a happy hour chewable with a good chardonnay. Leave them out from anything but a pot roast crock pot.

  2. Slather them in butter. Mmmm – I’m gonna go make a very buttery grilled cheese samich right now.

  3. I really have no opinion on carrots. I wouldn’t buy them and I wouldn’t order them as a side if given the option, but if they are served I might eat them. I can’t say as I dislike them, but I don’t really like them either.

    Bananas on the other hand are awesome. I like them in their natural form, I like them in bread, I like things flavored to resemble bananas (like pudding), and I even like a good old banana and peanut butter sandwich from time to time.

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