By Ari Ann Hedskin, for South DaCola
In an amazing change of heart, the Sisseton School Board has decided to change the name of their mascot.
“Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of things that are red that are cool, International and Massey-Ferguson tractors, Ferrari’s, Santa’s suit, but hey, it was time for a change,” says school board president Igor Nant.
While the controversy surrounded the derogatory name towards native Americans (Redmen), Igor says it had nothing to do with that.
“Hey, we were just tired of not seeing any Redmen (or Ferrari’s) around town, so what was the point? Not to mention, our town is famous throughout South Dakota for our homemade saltines!”
Yes, the ‘Sisseton Saltines’ may not have that ‘fighting’ mascot sound, but they sure are tasty with the corner bar’s famous goat/grouse chili.
“We may be called a cracker, but we are salty in our fight,” exclaims Igor (giggling and flagellating at the same time).
When area Lakota students were asked about the name change they said,
“Everyone knows an indian taco on pita bread beats podunk chili and crackers (unless Stephanie-Herseth-Sandlin-Raven is serving them).”
Either way, each party can now move on happily with full (and gassy) stomachs.