I would like to read your prose when it comes to dining out, or bad experiences you have had. Submit your entries in the comment section.
Your prize? I will buy you and a guest dinner at the place I work, BUT, you have to request me as your server, so I can pamper your ass. But there is a hook, you have to eat what I recommend.
Beer Jew and Angry Guy are excluded from this contest, just because.
Perhaps my most interesting dining experience occurred in the city of Kalmar Sweden. Went to a pizza place (I know) with some college kids I was touring Europe with. I and one of the young men sat down at a booth and ordered our pizza, while the other 8 members of our party were seated at a couple of the other 4 person booths. Next thing we know, the waiter brings over two young local ladies and sits them with us. This seemed rather starnge, so we asked of them if this was a frequent and/or usual thing (Not that we minded). They replied, “Oh yes, in Sweden when we go out to EAT, the food is what matters. It is not so important who we eat with.” We ended up having a nice conversation with them about the differences between American and Swedish social conventions. They did say that ordinarily, if seated with some strangers at a meal, conversation between the unfamiuliars would not typically be “on the menu”. However, they also said that Swedish women were typically fascinated by the straight forwardness and (relative to Swedish men) aggressive nature of American men, so……. let’s talk.
Great story. My experience with Europeans have been the same. They tell you what they think. It’s wonderful.
Fine, I won’t tell my stories here… but I do think we should have South DaCola restaurant reviews for new places opening up.
My first client was MCI Communications in 1980. At that time they had 11 employees (later 15,000 worldwide). We’d meet about every 6 months at their HQ in Washington DC. For lunch we’d go to an irish pub across ‘L’ Street. They always picked up the tab for 6 to 8. It was sandwich and tap beer. In 1988, I insisted on picking up the tab. It was $625 without tip. Apparently, the pub had become a must be seen at for the then MCI wall street wonder. The price became status oriented but the food and service was inferior to Applebee’s. I was worried about the limit on my credit card but still left a 15% tip.
Fine. I’ll burn my Riverdales shirt and pout for the rest of the day. Fuck You!
Once, a locally known Mexican “Casa” restaurant had a second location on the East side. A group of 10 or so to eat there after a local event. The drink order was first taken as expected and when the server delivered the drinks he forgot which one was what. So he suggested that we all take a sip and if it wasn’t the drink you ordered, pass it down until you got what you wanted… That should have been clue #1.
My son at the time was very specific on how he wanted his food. So when he ordered a salad, he was very specific that he only wanted croutons and cheese. Nothing else, with ranch dressing on the side. The salad was delivered with olives, onions,, and tomatoes mixed throughout. The server was gently and kindly reminded that his salad was ordered without those items, he replied “No problem”. Then he proceeded to reached over my son and in front of everyone at the table, he started to pick out the objectionable items in the salad with his hands and placed them on the table…
I still laugh when I think about this story.
For a more “local flavor” story – I’ll refer to the time I spent on the other side of the counter. Worked for a couple years as the “sous chef” (this meant I cut up potatoes for fries, made burger patties made chili, and washed dishes) at a little place that some of you may – or may not recall in Vermillion named either the “Zip House”, or the “Bun Palace”. There were 9 or 10 diner style seats at the counter. Grill, fryer, fridge, cash register, cupboards were all within about 5 feet of same counter. Two “up front” cooks, and me in the “back room” (smaller than the front). The place opened at 10:00 PM and closed at 3:00 AM. Most nights there was a line to get in on the sidewalk. And not a very orderly line either. Things inside were not much more orderly. Think about it – college town, within walking distance of about 8 bars. I would try to post something about a particularly obnoxious customer or event, but…….. there are just too many.
It must have been about 7 or 8 years ago, we went out to eat at the old downtown Brewery. We sat down on the east side of the building, and right from the start, it was a really bad server experience. Things got worse and worse, until finally I had enough and thought the management really needed to hear firsthand how its customers were being treated. I walked over to the bar side and asked the bartender if I could speak to the manager. He asked if there was a problem, I briefly told him about the server, he then tells me the server is the manager. I told him good luck on that one. I think the Brewery closed within a short time of our dining experience.
#1 New restaurants are the worst, especially for people who have been in the business as my bride and I have. We knew better than to go opening night…but…
We arrive and the place is full and bright and shiny and we are greeted with a smile and LOOK a table is just leaving. Let us clean that up and seat you right away.
I order a panini and my wife order chicken alfredo, the place is suppossed to be Itallian the way their grandpa made it (more on Grandpa’s cooking skills soon). We waited one hour and 23 minutes from seating to food arrival. We never received table settings in that hour 23 so I just went back the servers station and grabbed the settings, 2 glasses and a pitcher of water myself as in that time our soda’s hadn’t arrived.
Now onto grandpa’s food. Grandpa was a con man because his recipes were all pre-made microwavable crap. This made the wait even worse. The food was obviously pre-made. My thought is they didn’t have enough alfredo thawed out and had to thaw more. But, if that is the case then 86 the alfredo and let the diners know.
I asked for the manager…she comes to the table and I explain all to her. She apologizes and offers us a tiaramiso.
Ok…trying to make it right. THEY CHARGED US FOR THE MANAGER OFFERED DESSERT!!!!
I paid the bill and informed the manager I would sure to spread the word about the service we had received and the food we were served.
Almost in tears she informed me they weren’t ready to open. I then asked her why did you then? She walked away with head lowered gasping for air.
My darling bride, who at one time trained servers at the Ground Round, left the tip for our waiter. It was a note reading…”Here’s your tip, get a new job.”
The place closed in about 2 months.
#2 Twisted Fork, Old Market, Omaha…hip Americana, highly recommended. My bride and I and another couple decide to try it.
Great atmosphere. Bad seating by wait station and men’s room. 8 extremely pretty 20 something gals there for a bachelorette party right next to us eases some of that. (Married not blind). Waitress sells Andy and I on the Pot Roast (slow cooked and the best you will EVER tasted) special. Nellie gets a burger and Colleen gets Chicken Fried steak.
About 4 bites into the pot roast, carrots and taters and I say “I know this was last nights special”. Andy needs more water or lemonade to wash down his gravy sopped pot roast.
Houston we have a problem. I call for the manager and ask if this was indeed last nights special. Yup…sure was. I shake my head…she knows I know that they know better and the poor little waitress was coached to SELL SELL SELL that pot roast we got burned on Friday night.
The manager is wonderful and disposes of the pot roast and offers Andy and I both replacement entrees. Andy orders a burger I decline as I am pissed at this point, and saddened that this has happened on this very special trip 10th anniversary trip.
DAMN! The manager brings us Spin/Art dip and it’s home made and amazing with the also home made tortilla chips. Really good. But the bitter taste in my mouth won’t go away.
I’ve been that cook forcing little wait staff cuties to sell my leftovers. They knew better. They tried and they failed.
As we leave…a man in his 60’s has pushed aside his Pot Roast, barely touched, and is nursing his scotch. I travel to Omaha all the time, I know people who go there all the time…I recommend a couple places occasionally but I always tell people not to eat here.
#3 some quick serving/tending/cooking tidbits
pulling passed out drunk out of baked potato
prying my tip off of a maple syrup drenched table
cleaning up after your kids
Pouring you a drink no one has ever head of, as you described it and then being told I did it wrong.
Delivering you your steak done to your specifications only to find out you have no idea what you are talking about.
Special on the fly order, push aside other tickets…bust my ass and find out the asshole didn’t even tip my server.
Walking you out…getting you a cab and then having you throw up on me anyway.
Pretty Girl + cheap booze x drunken frat boys = Fuck this I’m not getting paid enough.
“This isn’t how it’s cooked in__________” (St. Paul, St. Louis, St. Petersburg, St Helena St why the fuck don’t you go back there!!!)
“I specifically said sweet and low; not sugar.” I’m sorry maam let me pull apart this coffee set up for you and take out all the white sugar packets so your old ass can see the BRIGHT PINK sweet and low packets on the other side!!!!
“Is this fresh tea? It doesn’t taste fresh.”
“Just coffee? You don’t have like latte’s or frapaccino’s?” This was when I was managing Mulligans Sports Bar.
I could go on and on. I worked in the business form the age of 14 to the age of 40 off and on. But I’ll stop there.
Shane
I will eat dirt and live under the O’Gorman bridge before I ever professionally cook or serve breakfast again.
I eat breakfast with old men who grumble about a lot of things.
We have eggs and sausages and fried potatos.
Gravy on it all.
People generally know to avoid us as we solve the world’s problems.
This is how breakfast should be.
Does anybody remember the Lafayette? Best service and food I’ve had most anywhere. I truly miss the Chateaubriand and cherries jubilee.
Scooter – That shit cracks me up. No wonder that location closed so fast. We have to ‘run’ other people’s food where I work, and I am a Nazi about things being correct when we expo them. Let’s just say, when I read a ticket that says ‘No cucumbers’ on a salad, I don’t have the salad remade 🙂 but it goes out correctly.
PL – Never ate there, but have heard many great stories. We need another French restaurant in SF. I have often said the city needs an organic, gourmet vegetarian restaurant. I have come up with the entire concept already, but, I have no money, and secondly, there is no money in the restaurant biz.
There used to be this place in Mpls called ‘The Mudpie’ that was very tasty.
No
The written message at the front of the restaurant says, “Please seat yourself.â€
This is never a good sign.
I stand in the entrance and read the sign again as I have so many times before, its bold black letters on a never quite white background.
I stand there and feel uncomfortable.
It’s a simple command,
One that I cannot bring myself to obey.
What if I seat myself in the back corner booth and none of the servers notice me?
What if one of them does, but he thinks I’m already being helped by someone else?
What if I am waiting for a really long time?
To me, dining out means being acknowledged, welcomed and shown to a table.
In its defense,
the sign does say please.
But still,
I refuse to obey a sign.
A sign cannot welcome me with friendly eyes and a smile.
A sign cannot offer up a cute little joke to brighten my day.
Frankly, a sign can’t do much of anything.
Sorry sign.
I’m being defiant.
Sometimes it’s simply easier to be difficult.
I am a guest after all.
I’ll exclude myself from this contest as well, but I thought I’d share a couple.
Before Sushi-Masa was Sushi-Masa it opened as some kind of Mexican joint, I don’t remember the name. Me and my girlfriend went there one night. It wasn’t busy, only one other table. We ordered drinks and we were served chips and salsa. They took our order and we waited. After about 45 min the server told us they were having some problems in the kitchen and offered us a free drink and some more chips and salsa. After about another 45 min the server came to our table and told us they were out of food and that they could not serve us tonight, but that the drinks were on the house. I have no idea what really happened considering we were the only people in the joint, but we left hungry and it closed soon after.
A group of friends and myself went to an Indian food place in the old market in the fall. It was dark out, but they had outside seating that we could sit at and eat right away. It was a warmish fall night so we agreed, but they had little lighting out so you could not see what you were eating. Me and a friend ordered hummus and pita as an appetizer. As I ate the hummus and pita I noticed some bites were really good but sometimes it tasted really off. I finally took one of the pieces of pita and looked at it under a sidewalk lamp. I saw it was covered in mold. I told my friend who was also eating it to take the basket of pita over to the lamp and look at it. We both were done eating at that point but the other three in our group said they had great meals.
In both these cases, I was so young and dumb I didn’t say boo to the manger or servers.
JR – You should known better, who could get a decent meal at a place called ‘Chips & Salsa’
Wasn’t the place located at Sushi Masa called El Torro?
ah, sanfords in rapid city…i do like the place, a lot of good beers on tap, best selection in rapid probably. The food is pretty decent too, although after working my way throught the menu i realized that pretty much everything there is covered in the same cajun seasoning. Cajon? Im not going to spellcheck….
Unfortunately, i’ve had a few bad experiecnes…and i wont ever go there again if i need to eat and go within an hour. First time just went out for dinner. Me and my buddy ordered some beers and ordered our food. Im kinda picky about some things…no cheese, no ranch on my burger please. My meal was brought out to me 4 times before it was made correct. Actually it still wasnt right but didnt have anything i hated so i ate it. After the 3rd time they said they would comp both our meals and all our drinks…our beer tab had gotten up there after 2 hours of waiting for my food. About 1.5 hours in, another friend joined us…they also compd his food and beers too haha. im glad they comped the tip too. (just kidding)
another time we had roughly an hour break or so to get back before an event. it was stormy night and my friend was working the bar. The place was dead…got a round and an appetizer. within 15 minutes or so…and then we waited…and waited…had my buddy check and they hadnt even started it…said they were short staffed…yeah it was a stormy night and some people might not of made it…but there was also only one other group there…i mean one person could have cooked and served everyone there. we had to bounce after an hour and fifteen.
somehow i still end up back there all the time tho…justn ot when im in a hurry or really hungry…
the old mexican restraunt in susi masa was call the el matador. i think there was a mexican restraunt of the same name there back in the 70’s as well.
This was in the early 90’s in the restaurant where Nutty’s North was recently located. My wife, my boss, his wife and I went there for dinner one night. The chilled chardonnay we ordered was served at room temperature so we asked for a chilled bottle which was barely colder than the first. A little later when I removed the napkin that covered the bread, a cricket jumped out from the basket. When the waiter came by to see how we were doing we mentioned the cricket. I immediately asked “whats for dessert, grasshopper pie?” The restaurant dutifully removed the charge for the warm bottle of chardonnay we didn’t drink in the first place.
@Charlie-Was that the nautical themed place or was that in the Buffalo Wild Wing Building?
I know I have eaten at both frequently since the mid 80’s. I know BWW building had a place called the Time Out at one point that had great food.
It was the Galley building but it may have been called Magnolias at the time. I have a story about the Time Out/BWW location too. We were part of a big group of couples that ate at the Time Out on News Years eve years ago. We all paid our bills at the end of the night and that was that. Except later that night the business was burglarized and all checks, cash and credit card receipts were stolen. The check we paid with was never cashed so we ended up with a nice freebie.
The galley That’s it. The Time out was often my pre concert meal grab when I would come up from Flandreau or Brookings for shows. Two concerts in a row (Alabama and Judas Priest) a waitress spilled water on me. Great food though.
Sushi Masa was 2 mexican restaurants before but in between was an italian place. Sushi Masa must have hired a witch to remove the hex. Sushi Masa sounds like a good rant party place?
The Galley had a dance bar in the lower level. When I was far younger, I left there many times with someones ex-wife.
RufusX with the swedish girls wins so far. L3wis had 2 swedes following him around for awhile.
Sushi Masa and Parkers are my two favorite restaurants in SF. The food at both of them is fantastic, every time. Service is also very good at both places, even though Sushi Masa can be a bit rocky at times, the booths are very comfortable and intimate and if you are dining with someone else, you will never notice.
The El Matador of the ’70’s era was actually quite good.
This is true, I think the latter Mexo joint was not the same people.
Little known tid-bit; the servers at Sushi Masa have to do laundry (table clothes) as one of their server duties. That shit cracks me up.
I’ll chime in anyway because I feel like it. I’ve been fortunate to have very rare experiences with bad food or service .
The worst food I ever had was at a place called Foghorns. This was in the old Kirk’s West location–which oddly enough was kick ass food along with GREAT signage. I originally ordered a burger at Foghorn’s–still half frozen. They took it back and I asked for some ribs. Ribs came out hard as a rock. I basically said “fuck this” and went to Taco John’s. Foghorn’s is long gone and a Walgreen’s is in its place. So if you need some ass grease or circus peanuts you’re in business.
Worst service. I’ve had slow service and inexperienced wait staff but nothing that compares to the others that have posted. Like I said, I’ve been really lucky.
Honorable mention for good service was when I was in North Carolina for a engineering seminar. Everytime the bartender poured the wrong beer she would give it to me for free. Shit, I felt like Gene Simmons.
@Beer Jew when I managed The Cattlemans Club, and Mulligans I made it standing policy that if you were a regular we bought you your preferred drink. Also if you were a regular you had better not even have to ask for your drink. By the time you sat down your drink should be being poured. Bonus for regulars you got the extras from all the blender drinks and first shot at mis-pours. Talk about feeling like Gene Simmons…
I really want to hear “Here comes a Regular” now.
Shane
“…….I really want to hear “Here comes a Regular†now…….”
Scott Hudson probably has a spuzz face every time he reads that.
Scott and I were just talking Replacements Thursday.
Hahahahah beer Jew.
Well, since BeerJ brought up the concept of BEST service, I’ll have to relate another experience. When I was living in San Francsico, working at KQED (Yan can Cook, etc.) there was a new hire as executive assistant to the CEO. Now, part of my duties included taking new executive hires on a tour of the new building under construction project I was involved with as a consultant. So, I took this woman on “the tour”. Really great 29-year-old Chinese gal (and me with an Asian fetish – yoikes!!). So anyhow, we hit it off pretty well during the tour, so she asks me if I want to go out for dinner with her and a couple friends after. I say – sure!
Turns out, her parents had been in the restaurant business in Portland, OR for many many years, and were WELL connected in the West Coast Asian Restaurateur community. Didn’t hurt that her brother owned the San Francsisco BMW dealership either I suppose. So, we meet her friends and head for Chinatown. The place we go to is just a door on the street with some Chinese words on it. Upstairs – second floor. Very intimate, small, only 4 or 5 tables. We sit down. Immediately, there are about 5 wait-staff hovering around and poof – we all have water, tea, napkins, candle light, etc. The gal says, “Don’t even bother with the menu – let me order – I know this place.” So she does so – all in Chinese. It turns into about a 13 course meal, served family style. Everything done like a classic synphony by a very experienced orchestra (literally at least 10 different wait staff constantly bringing, taking, cleaning, replacing, refilling, and so on). As soon as one plate or dish, or cup or glass was empty, or everyuone had had their fill of it – woosh! it was gone and the next course was served. Amazing – felt like frikkin’ royalty!! It was such an amazing experience, I just picked up the whole tab. Good thing I had American Express – no limit. If I remember right about 280 – 1990 dollars. Couldn’t find the place again if I had to.
Needless to say, I had a few more excellent dining experiences with her – but nothing like that first one. Another interesting thing was – she didn’t like chopsticks – preferred to use western utensils. Me, I liked the chopsticks.
Before the Carnival was built they had a ‘testing’ site called the ‘Brazilian Cafe’ DT in the Parker’s location. A had dinner there one night, and was disappointed that Carnival wasn’t identical to this place. You paid a flat fee for a five-course meal that was being served that night. Everything included except wine or beer. It was fantastic. The meal that night was centered around shrimp. The main course was a amazon(?) giant shrimp. It still had it’s head on it and was the size of a lobster, and it tasted like lobster, it was awesome. I wish we had a place in town like that, or a French place that served 5-course planned meals.
Does anyone besides me remember the Northlander in Sioux Falls?
That place and the Glass House in Ihlen MN made me the foodie I am today.
The Northlander burned the night before my friend’s wedding, the reception was to be held there. I remember their spectacular Sunday brunches, piano playing, very elegant. I am still in mourning for them.