EggBert

EggBert salutes (normal) Fathers on Father’s Day 2009!

EggBert June 21, 2009 1Comments

Greetings, blogger friends:

Whether you have or had a dad or not, or are a dad or have almost been a dad or killed a baby doing an abortion or competing masterbation or not – in honor of this year’s Daddy’s Day, I would like to post an assortment of photos that I took recently of some REALLY GOOD DADS in this beloved city of ours – HAPPY (normal) FATHER’S DAY!!!

And finally, a photo (that my dad sent me from somewhere deep in the heart of sleazy & socialistic Canada) of MY BASTARDLY DAD, eGGbert Bundy Bunker Mushroom Munchkin Brussel Sprouts Goofenstein, & his best friend of the past 3 and a 1/2 weeks, HandsyPaulaPansy…

Sincerely,

EggBert TGIFather’s Day – so my dad can get a piece of Pansy’s Ass as I live in the simple, sin-less & proper lifestyle of Abstinence-Only!!!)

Ned & Jed's Excellent Venture – Start of Summer Vacation 2009

EggBert June 14, 2009 0Comments

Hello – How are you all?

Ned & Jed Nugent wanted to share some family “action” photos of their recent family vacation which they have officially & fondly deemed their “Fight White Right Lite-Brite” Start of Summer Tour – 2009

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New York, New York –

Washington, D.C. –

Wichita, Kansas –

Bangkok –

Video Lottery Establishments petition drive across South Dakota –

When the boys had some downtime in their newly-customized Nugent Winnebago family truckster station wagon tank, Ned & Jed proudly (and EVER-SO-CAREFULLY, mind you) worked together on this Lite Brite project –

Sincerely,

EggBert & the Nugents (except Creamy Nugent, her warm & fuzzy poochie, Pubes, and her lip-smacking pussy, Mr. Lucky O’LickMeister, who all stayed in Sioux Falls to suckle such local tasty treats such as Bob Jamison Junior’s delicious & stimulating Tax Abatement idea & rootin’ for the soon-to-be construction of the new even HIGHER-PRICED city event center/coliseum.  Creamy’s comments: Yippy Yay! – ain’t suckling Sioux Falls just the best?  These great things are gonna make Sioux Falls develop better and for sure be all that more sucksessfful, like the other day when  Pubes sucked on Mr. Lucky O’LickMeister’s hair-ball.) 

The EggBert Family is sincerely orgasmic about the new indoor (whoops, we mean) outdoor Drake Springs Pool!

EggBert May 28, 2009 5Comments

Man on the Moon the movie

HAPPY EggBert Family Memorial Day!

EggBert May 25, 2009 0Comments

To Everyone (except anti-killing war idiots, anti-growth-driven Vernal Brownie protestors, transgendered lesbo-gaybots who are also usually anti-beloved Dickie C. dicks, people with abnormally colored “devil” skin, anti-Abstinence/Pasor Steve sex-perps, & Sioux Falls Federal Credit Union employees/customers): 

HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY!!! 

Celebrate together as a family as the EggBert family does, by shopping all day for deals at the Empirical Mall & shooting tombstones at local cemetaries, etc.

(Below are a few of last year’s photos of the EggBert family “honoring the dead & doin’ it big” on Memorial Day) –

Sincerely,

EggBert & his very, very F*#%$!+-‘:>,?.@`~=:\}|{)(< – ing Egg-Centric Family

HAPPY MOTHER EggBertrude Day!!!

EggBert May 9, 2009 0Comments

Dear other ones:

HAPPY MOTHER’s DAY, or as the family EggBert calls it – HAPPY MOTHER EggBertrude Day!!!

Our family wrote this Ode to Mother EggBertrude the day she mysteriously vanished on Mother’s Day, 1979:

“Oh, Mother EggBertrude, where art thou? Lest we count the ways you vanished, we hope you are having a grand old opery time & haven’t allowed the aliens, Mexicans, or townsfolk, etc. to yet 1) crack your baby-making, egg sack, 2)  manipulate your disco inferno, or most of all, 3) catapult you into a futuristically unrealistic world of Negro U.S. Presidents…”

Today, in 2009, as we continue to search high but mostly low for you, Oh MOTHER EggBertude –

– we want you to know that you remain in our hearts, our prayers, & in our stomachs as we continue our annual Mother EggBertrude Day EggBert Family Feast & Strip-Scrabble tournament, as the EggBert family enjoys fun & fellowship in your honor feasting together on the tasty traditional Mother EggBertrude casserole – made from the multiple stem-cell eggs (still ripe from her rather loose-lipped 70’s womb-bag) that we keep finding in the EggBert family backyard sandbox/gravel garden/event center/youth football complex -  and that over the years we have supplemented the fine feast with an assortment of  sprinkled, sassy & spicey sperm samples then stirred to a crisp…

• Wit licht download

Yum! (Hey, that’s a three letter triple word score – there goes Uncle Rusty’s Captain Kirk underpants…)

HAPPY MOTHER EggBertrude Day!!!

Sincerely,

EggBert & Family (except Mother EggBertha, who is somewhere where nobody knows or boldy goes anymore…)