America

The coolest kitchen gadget of all time

It’s hard to tell from the picture, but the device you see here will revolutionize the kitchens of beer lovers the world over. It is a totally self-contained, self-cleaning brewery inside a kitchen cabinet. It does the entire process of brewing beer from sterilization of the equipment all the way to the taps at the other end. It includes two 7.5 gallon containers under the taps so you can have two brews at the same time – make your own black and tan!

This is just the sort of device we’ll need to bring ourselves out of this recession.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

When we bury the truth, we do not bury consequences. We only stand in the way of the American people. We keep this government of, by, and for the people from working as it should. And when we are complicit in burying the truth, we need to know well that we are also complicit in burying ourselves . . .                        Dan Rather

I want everyone to know that though this site may be rude, sarcastic, snarky, nasty, offensive and downright rotten sometimes, it is in the pursuit of the truth. Though there are many ways to pursue the truth, I choose satire, it is what I am most comfortable with. And for those of you that understand, I welcome you. For those of you who don’t, I encourage you to educate yourselves. Apathy, ignorance and denial will destroy this democratic nation. Dissent, knowledge, diplomacy and practicing our civil liberties will make us great.

Jello for Change

If you haven’t written your ideas for change in government on Change.gov yet, it’s time to get on the ball. Jello Biafra (formerly of the Dead Kennedys) beat you to the punch. Using nearly half to two-thirds of the government’s server space to spout off on the kind of change aging-punks-turned-spoken-wordsmith need, Biafra laid out what President-Elect Obama should do in his term as a President. I have a life, so I did not read it all, but here are a few highlights, most of which I agree…

  • Employ the assistance of willing Muslim volunteer nations (Indonesia, Malaysia, Bangladesh, Pakistan, Yemen and Morocco) to police Iraq instead of our own troops.
  • Abolish torture in the intelligence community.
  • Undo any of the Bush administration’s signing statements tacked onto bills he signed in order to restore the rule of law.
  • Stamp out election fraud.
  • Limit political campaigns to between 30 and 60 days. Apparently some country to the north already does this.
  • End the war on drugs.
  • Economic stimulus to the people who need it, not corporations.
  • Give the auto industry a bailout when they produce greener cars.
  • More trains.
  • It goes on from here…

If you haven’t written your letter to Mr. Obama, you may want to get on it. Biafra has beat us to many of the best points.