Search Results: Eggbert

Season’s Greetings, everybody:

My neigbor Ned Nugent’s daughter, Creamy Nugent, has been warmly yearning to bring her opinion to this website for a long time, and now that moment has finally come: “YUM! YUM! I am getting simply “C-string climactic in my Creamy zone” anticipating these scrumptious city calendars to arrive at my front door as I heard that they are going to be filled with revealing photos this year – I don’t care how much of our hard-earned trick money the city used to pay for these, because can you just imagine how many of Bob Schlitz’s  muscles are going to be shown in this calendar?  And I am warm and wild with wetness just thinkin’ about Cuddly Kermitt layin’ out his best pose on the city hall polar bear rug - ooooohhhyyyyaaahhhhhhh - I just hope the postman rings more than twice when bringing this “Beware Bad Boy” calendar to my yeasty doorstep!”

http://www.siouxfalls.org/News/2008/December/12/calendars

   

Sincerely,

EggBert blah blab blub

Hello there, nice folks:

Granny Gumption has a Quick Comment about her former favorite grandson love – uhhh – ME…???

http://www.voicescarryblog.com/confused-sd-cartoonist-takes-aim-at-me-again/#comments

“Crimminy, Crime-iny!! I used to love my grandson, EggBert, with all my heart and soul, but now, like my former favorite grandson, EgoBart, he too has gone by way of the looney toons.  Thank the Lord Almighty for good sexual-issue crisis-counselin’, righteously God-followin’ folks like Pastor Steve and his fellow intellectual website postin’ devote-hardened Christians. Though EggBert has givin’ me good lovin’ in the past, NOW that I know he’s in cahoots with Mr. 13wussy-hippy pants –  bein’ part of his personality and all – I’m gonna just slap ol’ Eggy-Babes up one side and down the other whene I next make him save biffy-flushin’ costs by peein’ into my coffee can. He can take his splashed-on, pee-stained socks and suck on ’em. Or better yet, I say we hack off his baby-making peewee.”

Later that day –

To Granny – thank you so much for bringing up this horrible thing that I have done, and for slapping me so hard that I wet myself again.  One night, just after the Presidential election, I slipped a little in my Christian-walk when I masterbated against a soft and cuddly Islamic-talkin’ toy doll, fell asleep from pure exhaustion and post tingly-glow, found myself sleepwalking toward Mr. 13wissy’s bungalow, and merged with his personality via an evil Obamaesque Mind-Meld.  Being a part of Mr. 13wissy’s personality has led me to this realization – that I do not want to be part of it anymore because it is ICKY – so I have since had my personality transferred back into Pastor Steve’s brain via the Paladin-ish Bristol Boyfriend Brain Drain  – and am now living safely within its comfy and cozy confines, soaking in LOTS of LOVEY-DOVEY fetal/Unruuughhhh love and Women’s Choice/sicko Gay hate (to only name a few).  

I will now once again make you proud, Granny Gumption!

Sincerely,

EggBert (LET’S GET STARTED SOON ON THE NEXT “BAN ABORTION BECAUSE WE ARE SMARTEST CAMPAIGN”) Tiberi. Frankfu Ichabo. Goofen.

Sincerely,

EggBert /.,mnbvcxz